Time for a funny story. Enough with this depressing stuff.
An hour or so ago, I decided to take a nice hot soak in the bath. I stripped down naked and got the water running, and turned around to find a disgusting, squirming, enormous earwig writhing in my bathwater.
Now tell me, what would any sane, normal woman do? Of course. Scream repeatedly until their husband comes and kills it. Duh.
I even threw in a pretty melodramatically fake puking noise.
When Nathan didn't come to assist his damsel in distress, of course I went to find him. I popped out of the bathroom to find Nathan at the front door with our elderly neighbor, Mrs. B, who was holding a large, beautiful pie.
Yes, our front door is in direct sight of our bathroom door.
I yelped and popped back into the bathroom immediately, but not before poor Mrs. B. got an eyeful of the jiggly, disgusting, bloody mess that I am. Poor poor Mrs. B.!
Mrs. B. then called out kindly "Are you alright?" (Yes, she heard my screams and puking sounds), and I just popped my head out and reported that there was an earwig. I hid in the bathroom and sat there mortified until she left.
Nathan came to find me and laughed at me while I cried about it. I cried.... until I started laughing at how silly the whole situation was and how Mrs. B. was probably equally as embarrassed as I was.
I called her after I had composed myself and after saying that she "barely saw anything", she reported that she giggled all of the way home. What an awesome old lady.
Then I thoroughly enjoyed her delicious pie.